The Amazing Race 16--Episode 11 and Finale

It's been weeks since TAR 16 ended and even longer since I've written a blog on that show, or anything else for that matter. BTW, I know tonight is the last episode of Lost and I could give less than a flying fig as Dorothy said on that episode of the Golden Girls when she was waiting for a call from her married lover played by Jerry Orbach. For the past two months I have been rushing from one show to another and from one award event to the next. When the Broadway season ends, everyone gives out endless awards. Tonight is the latest of these, the Drama Desk Awards and I will be taking a train from upstate to the city to attend. I will write more about that in the next blog, but for now I fell compelled to wrap up my reactions to the latest Amazing Race.

Episode 11 began in Shanghai where the cheapskate producers confided the racers to the same city as the previous leg rather than have them fly to another city. The idea was basically for the four teams to battle it out for the final three slots. Team Such As actually stepped up their game and did an excellent job. Caite mastered her counting skills and they lucked out with a good cab driver while the gay-straight brothers had the worst one on the whole race--though it was kind of ridic of Dan to think they would find an English-speaking driver in China. As Mrs. Gibbs said in Our Town, there are people in the world who don't talk in English and don't even want to. The Undercover Cops had the extremely difficult Speed Bump of tossing coins into the mouth of an idol. Why don't they just call it the Millisecond Delay and be more accurate! I am sick of these ultra-easy speed bumps. In fact, this whole race has been like the dumbed-down version. (More on that in the next episode) So I have to give credit to Team Such As. I admit it, they are not as dumb as they look.

But in the final episode all their hard work was for naught. With the cops gone, it was pretty much anybody's game. But Dan and Jordan totally turned it up a notch. Their strategy was to be meek little twinks, not be a threat, and just get to the final three. Then push everyone out of the way and cross the finish line. I wouldn't have butted ahead of the cowboys at the Shanghai airport, but Jordan knew there would be nothing the cowboys could do about it since hitting another team is grounds for expulsion. On the flight to San Francisco, they sneaked into first class. In previous episodes, it was revealed teams are not allowed to fly in anything other than tourist. But I guess the technicality is that Dan and Jordan bought their tickets in economy and where they actually sit doesn't matter (????)

I think the gay-straight brothers really wanted to win badly and it showed in their determination in the final leg. The claws were out and they didn't care who got scratched. Team Such As reverted to whiny adolescents when they drew a bad cabbie ("Oh this is so unfair!") and were basically out of the running as soon as they got off the plane. That left the cowboys and the brothers and the latter were just hungrier than Jet and Cord. The final memory challenge had to be the easiest ever. Remember when they had to get the flags of the countries they visited in order? That was HARD. And the one with the various items from the challenges having to weight exactly the right amount? This time all they had to do was remember who got eliminated in which leg.

The finish line finale was totally ruined for me with the bitch fight between Caite and Brandy (or was it Carol?) That has NEVER happened before on an Amazing Race finale when a THIRD-PLACE finisher has an argument with a losing rival. It was obviously for ratings since Caite is pretty and popular. It was awful and embarassing and took away the spotlight from the winners--Dan and Jordan. It's their triumph, their moment in the sun should not be eclipsed by a stupid grudge match. Brandy made an absolute fool of herself. She should have just said, "It's over. You got to the Uturn first, it's a game and you did want you had to do to get ahead." Plus they got a quote from ANOTHER loser--the Big Brother guy Jeff. Who cares what he thinks? He lost...BIG TIME!!! Again it was for ratings. Lots of people watch Big Brother so they needed to give that team some airtime beyond cheering on the winners. I thought Emmy winning Amazing Race was better than that. And BTW, screw you Donald Trump with your sour-grapes over losing the Emmy every time. Get over it.

Overall, this was an exciting season and the best part was that a single team did not dominate. Last season that blonde couple came in first something like seven times. It was pretty clear they would win the big prize. This time the cowboys and the police won the most, but they made plenty of mistakes too. So it could have been anybody and it was great that an underdog team like Dan and Jordan surged ahead at the end.

Day 18--Still in Shanghai, find bridge, count statues, find stamp, really hard stuff

Day 19--fly to San Francisco

Day 20--final leg

Dan and Jordan--BIG WINNERS, $1,000,000 plus one previous win, loot: two motorbikes
Jet and Cord--four wins, Loot: two sailboats, trip to Patagonia, trip to Maui, trip to Alaska
Louie and Michael--three wins, Loot: two Discover Cards worth $5,000 each, two 55-inch HD TVs, trip to Cancun
Branden and Caite--one win, Loot: trip to Spain
Jeff and Jordan--one win, Loot: trip to Vancouver
Steve and Allie--one win, Loot: $7,000 each, relaxing dinner and massage on the beach and "all the 7-Up they can drink"